Posts Tagged ‘emotions’

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Blocked

December 22, 2017

I get you.

There were so many nights, I’m sure, that you struggled to silence the noise inside your head, but you just can’t.

How you pace back and forth by the front door waiting, counting the hours, the minutes, the seconds until the knob finally turns.

How you stare up the ceiling trying so hard not to panic but instead find yourself heavily breathing beneath the sheets of a cold and empty bed.

How you feel inadequate and not enough to fill his eyes, his thoughts, his lust.

A frantic scream, a restless void that you can’t seem to comprehend.

I get you.

He told me you weren’t okay but I never took a glance at how horribly he painted the woman he vowed to love for the rest of his life.

I know those were all pent up emotions and sometimes we say things we don’t really mean.

Maybe I was wrong to engage him in conversation.

Maybe I was wrong to have felt sorry for you and encouraged him to go home.

Maybe I was wrong.

I don’t know.

Truth is, there’s nothing to be scared of really.

What he and I had was far long forgotten but I understand if you feel the need to hate me. Hate me all you want, if that brings your mind at peace, hate me, that’s okay.

Because I get you.

I’ve been through the same, much worse even.

And I get you.

xx

DMV

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Pain inspires

June 15, 2017

If there is one thing I have learned from the past four years, is that pain inspires me more than anything. I could never really write about love or happiness, I just normally suck at it. But pain–oh pain is the ink that fuels the rambling chaos inside my head which randomly spill onto blank pages and they make such beautiful unconventional art. So to everyone who has caused me pain or shared with me their pain, thank you so much for injecting feelings and emotions to this numb heart.

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That night, she knew she should stop hoping.

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Hardened Heart

December 10, 2014

And just so suddenly
You notice,
The sea of memories you are blinded to,
From the dust of simple things,
That trigger what was so delicately hidden to resurface.

And just so suddenly
A hope starts to flicker,
And fear threatens a war on the flood of emotions starting to burn,
A surge of what ifs play on.

And just so suddenly
You hit reality,
Reminded of the storm of chaos this little hope would eventually bring,
And fear finally wins.

That brief moment of eyes crinkling and lips smiling may not be worth it.

And just so suddenly,
You forget.
You stand.
You walk.

xx

DMV

IMG_3067.JPG (Photo courtesy: Google Images)

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