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Single Mommyship

June 28, 2016

And all the stereotypes that go along with it.

NO, totally not my fault I’m in this situation. I did not choose to become a single mom, I mean who in their right mind wouldn’t want their kids to grow up with a complete family? But unfortunately, it did not work out like it should for us and life just has to go on. I’d rather be alone than be stuck in a very unhealthy relationship, seriously.

But these stereotypes. Sorry if I am PMSing, but really?

One stereotype that really irks me is that when you date a single mom, she will financially drain you. (WTF?)

C’mon, living in a third world, poverty stricken country doesn’t only limit “single moms” that will feed on your very fat bank account. The impoverished marginalized has long discovered pimping their children (daughters) to Caucasians with the thinking that if he’s white and has dollars, they be rich.

So do not categorize me into some money hungry single mother because honestly I don’t need your money. I work hard to earn a living for me and my kids and we are totally fine. It’s all a matter of time and financial management, a matter of priorities. And with what I do, my kids are able to go to reputable schools; eat 3, 5 times a day; involve in extra curricular activities; I am able to pay bills; my dogs have updated shots; I buy them dog food; I get to buy “want” stuff for my children, “want” stuff for myself and we can afford to go on vacations (even bringing along the nanny).

And yes, I also have a social life. I can afford my Jack Ds, you don’t need to buy me a drink.

I think I know myself really well, I know I am not a bad person and I know I’ve got so much to offer although I also know for a fact I don’t really need a man in my life. So if you come up to me, tell me you like me, ask for my number and then find out that I have kids and just suddenly gives me the silent treatment or go cold turkey on me, please do not assume that I am looking for someone to father my children, I’m not; do not assume that I am looking for someone to provide for me and my kids, I could very well provide for myself and my kids and my dogs; we could always be friends, I don’t intend to marry you (rolls eyes).

I totally get if some people (men) want to steer away from single mothers thinking of the baggage upon baggage upon baggage these moms be carrying but I just hope that you have enough respect and see past through your narrow mindedness and actually see how strong these women are. I understand that a woman with lots of responsibilities (children) is sometimes too much to handle but please know that being a single mother isn’t easy and it wouldn’t hurt for you to be a little kind. We feel like everyone else, bleed like everyone else. We struggle like everyone else because our children solely depends on us. We give and love twice as much to compensate for the father that is not there.

Please stop stereotyping us and possibly treat us like normal people, because we are.

 

xx

DMV

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