Ephesians 4:31-32 (NLT) “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”
That’s what Pastor Boris Joaquin cited last January 25, 2015 at Ikthus Bacolod about the Road to Recovery. I remember him sharing about his troubled relationship with his dad; how he masked his bitterness with success; how he always says he and his dad is okay when in truth, he resented him. I also remember him saying that forgiving someone takes time; that we need to forgive others because God has forgiven us and resentment just doesn’t work. “It’s not really what you eat but what eats you that matters.”
I’m very much closely acquainted with resentment. And though I’ve dealt with countless ugly events in my life, I’ve mustered burying them in a large vacuum at the bottom of my brain, compiled and kept. Problem is, this void is open, unchained, so tendency is, at the height of various, triggering moments, they resurface. And guess who is left frustrated? Me.
When there is resentment, everything gets affected. All your energy tend to focus on that one thing, that one nonsensical thing that you so obviously could do without and the more important things are left neglected and unappreciated.
You haven’t truly forgiven if there is still resentment in your heart. To forgive is to free your heart from any bitterness that you’ve harbored from the ones that hurt you. Yes it will take time, and eventually, I know I will get there. For now, I’m settled with “I’m doing fine.”
Sharing Day 241 of the reading plan I am currently on from http://www.joycemeyer.org/ Joyce Meyer: Promises for Your Everyday Life – a Daily Devotional
Stop Keeping Score
If someone has hurt you, don’t spend the next ten years of your life hurting yourself by hanging on to that offense. Most likely, the other person isn’t even thinking about you, while you dwell on the incident for years. That only hurts one person, you.
When we walk in unforgiveness, we try to “keep score,” viewing ourselves as better than the other person.
Back in the early days of our marriage, when Dave and I were fussing and fuming at each other, I would bring up stuff that happened years before and Dave would say, “Where do you keep all that stuff?” Well, I had a place, and it was all in there eating at me. And every new thing Dave did wrong would get added to this list, and it kept growing until it became a bitter giant in my heart.
When we walk in God’s love, we find freedom by keeping “no account” of wrongs done to us. If you’re hurting from the pain of unforgiveness today, ask God to help you stop keeping score. You can let go of your bitterness today.
Prayer Starter: God, I don’t want to keep score anymore and let my unforgiveness hurt me. I release it to You and ask You to help me walk in Your love, which keeps “no account of the evil done to it.”
It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. (1 Corinthians 13:5 NLT)